5. Is the Itty Bitty Sh*tty committee running the show?

We all have one. The Itty Bitty Shitty Committee is made up of the voices in your head that have nothing useful to say. Also known as your internal Negative Nelly, your Inner Mean Girl, or as someone I know likes to call it, Ursula.

This term was first introduced to me by Jane Pike, a successful skills, mindset and trauma-informed movement coach for equestrians. 

The Itty Bitty Shitty Committee (or IBSC) is the chorus of voices in your head that you might associate with the critical voice. How comfortable be are with expressing our actual voice depends on how rampant our IBSC is.

For me, the IBSC shows up when I'm thinking about signing up for a horse show. Thoughts like "I'll probably get a flat tyre on the way" (that's never happened, for the record) often hold me back from competing, when I know that if I just pushed through the resistance, I would go and have a really lovely time.

The only purpose the IBSC has, is to keep you safe. As Jane puts it: "Safe doesn't necessarily mean happy or thriving or the best version of yourself. Its primary purpose is to make sure you stay in your place so there's no disruption we might perceive as negative... I'm surprised at how vicious it can be!"

When we get into cycles of shame and discomfort when we’re challenged in some way, it can be easy to fall into the place of giving in to those voices. The danger here is quite significant though, in that if we do give our limiting beliefs and self-criticising thoughts more credence than they should be given, we make decisions off the back of that.

Consider this: if your IBSC is shouting that you're not good enough to do something, you can get really down on yourself. And this sets off a pretty detrimental cycle.

The IBSC is a very natural expression of the edge of your comfort zone. But we all know what they say about comfort zones - and they're not where you want to live if you want to get ahead in your career!

Many women give up before they even start, because we're taught to think critical thinking - and if what we're thinking is that we're not good enough, then surely that's a sign, right? WRONG. While our culture and education system really values critical thinking and logic, that first thought (I'd love to try x, I'd be a great team leader, etc) is usually the true one, and the second is the conditioned thought (What if I fail? What if something goes wrong?) is your Itty Bitty Shitty Committee having an unscheduled board meeting.

How do you differentiate between critical thinking and hyper-critical thinking?

The content of the IBSC has no value feedback. The committee tends to be very personal in nature, and we tend to not be able to take anything away from it. Thoughts like “who do you think you are?”, “You’re not good enough” – blanket statements that you can’t draw anything useful from – are usually the IBSC talking. Whereas, if we’re having a rational conversation with ourselves, you might take a step out of your comfort zone and you’ll hear a voice asking, “do you think you’re ready for that?” And THAT voice, is your inner voice. It encourages you to think critically without being critical. It's not telling you you're useless or hopelessly talentless, it's asking you to check in with yourself and make an informed decision. 

What should you do if the IBSC is holding you back?

I can't say this loudly enough: get some professional help! So many women let their own inner critic hold them back in so many areas of life, but a career coach is a great place to start. You can find my offerings via the coaching tab at the top of this page, or a quick Google search will find a career coach in your local area. Be sure to check their Google reviews! 

I honestly loved my chat with Jane about this topic and more. This is just a snippet of what we discussed! You can listen to the full episode with Jane Pike way back in Episode Six of the Lady Leadership Podcast, here.

And if you're an equestrian, I highly recommend you check Jane's incredible work out, here.